Are Grayson Allen, Ted Cruz and Kevin from The Office all the same person? An Investigation

Last night, Grayson Allen showed he is still one of the best college basketball players in the nation and still one of the most despised players in the nation. Over the 2nd ranked Michigan State Spartans, Allen dropped 37 points, 3 rebounds and 2 assists. He went 7-11 from 3 and played all 40 minutes. One could make the argument that he is the most hated Duke player ever and probably one of the better players from the long lineage of Duke villains. Allen's reputation proceeds himself, whether it be the multiple cases of tripping opponents, throwing tantrums on the bench or just being an overall prototypical Duke player by throwing elbows and being insufferable. I would say that out of the classic Duke villains, Allen is the most universally hated. But, is Grayson Allen hiding something from the public, namely that he is also Ted Cruz and Kevin from The Office?

It is no secret that Ted Cruz is one of the most polarizing figures in American politics over the last 10 years. Even his own colleagues in the Senate have come out and said they do not like him. Ted Cruz always finds a way to become the butt of any joke on Twitter or just in popular culture in general. But, is he also the most despised college basketball player? I mean, look at that picture. The proof is in the pudding. Could all three be the same person, but at different stages of their life? Obviously, Allen would be the younger, college aged version, who then morphs into an balding accountant in Scranton Pennsylvania? It is distinctly possible.

That being said, where does Ted Cruz fit into the narrative? In my opinion, after being an accountant for a few years, Allen gets hair plugs and moves to Texas to pursue a new career in politics. At the point, he becomes Ted Cruz and they we have it, folks, the case is solved. Some may say, well hey, Ted Cruz and Grayson Allen are both in the public eye right now, so they can't be the same person. However, have we seen them together? I didn't think so.

P.S. There are many flaws in this theory, but I enjoy it.